If you’re a victim of sexual trauma, healing may seem like a long and difficult journey ahead. For many victims, the most challenging part of recovery is knowing where to start. Sexual assault is an incredibly intimate violation, and there is no right or wrong way to begin your healing process.
The first and most important step is to understand that what happened to you is not your fault, and you deserve to be able to move forward and heal. There are many ways to start your journey to recovery from sexual trauma — let’s look at some options.
Talk About It
It’s not easy to open up about sexual trauma. For many victims, they’d much prefer to repress the memories of their assault. While it may feel safest to repress your memories right now, the road to recovery starts with opening up about your experience. You can tell a friend, parent, therapist, or anyone with whom you feel safe.
Keep in mind that you can do this on your terms. You don’t have to share details, or tell others, if you feel uncomfortable. However, when you do find someone you feel safe telling, it can help begin your healing process. Many victims of sexual assault struggle afterward because they feel alone. Remember that you aren’t alone, and there are people who can help you work through your trauma.
Learn How to Cope with Panic and Upsetting Memories
When people experience physical traumas, it’s common to experience flashbacks in the aftermath. You may experience intrusive thoughts, triggering memories, and possibly panic attacks. When you find yourself in a moment of panic, remember that you are safe, and it’s just a memory. Focus on grounding yourself back into reality and know that the negative feelings will pass. It isn’t easy coping with triggers and intrusive memories, which is another reason why it’s a good idea to talk about your trauma.
Many survivors of sexual assault develop post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), which quickly becomes debilitating for some people. You can work through your trauma and find ways to cope. Remember that even the worst of the memories are just that — memories. Over time, you will be able to leave them behind and focus on healing.
Let Go of Guilt or Shame
Many survivors of sexual assault experience guilt or shame. You may blame yourself for your assault or wonder why you weren’t able to prevent it from happening. Because victim-blaming is so prevalent in our society, many victims carry a burden of guilt or shame after their assault. A critical part of healing is understanding that you do not deserve to feel guilty or ashamed.
The assault was not your fault, and you did not do anything to deserve it. We can’t control what other people do, and it isn’t fair to burden yourself with the idea that you could have, or should have, done something differently. You are the victim of the situation, not the perpetrator. Start telling yourself that your assault was not your fault. Slowly but surely, you can relieve yourself of guilt and shame and head towards healing and recovery.
Everyone copes with trauma differently, so you can’t compare your recovery to someone else’s. As you begin healing from sexual trauma, keep this notion in mind. During your journey through recovery, you’ll have both good and bad days. On the good days, remember and acknowledge how far you’ve come. On the bad days, rely on your resources and loved ones to help get you through it. Over time, you will recover from your trauma and find ways to cope.
You have come so far as a survivor, and you deserve to live your life to its fullest potential. Take the first steps and reach out to trusted loved ones and a compassionate therapist to begin your healing process. The therapists at the Relationship Counseling Center of Austin work with clients who are recovering from trauma in their lives. To schedule an appointment, give our office a call at (512) 270-4883, or request a session online through the RCC Austin Scheduling page.
For more information, click here: Trauma Counseling.